3 months ago I had a stroke. It's erased most of my memory of the last 10 years. I'm kind of freaking out because all I have are the old emails, conversations and such. Before the stroke I turned into this horrible person. Nothing I'm proud of. I have pictures of old friends on my wall in my bedroom and for the life of me I can't remember why all the friendships ended. I want my friends back. I want my life back. I want so badly to walk on my own without a walker to help aid me. Sydney turned 16 recently and I want her to not be scared of this old person I feel like inside. I'm scared to sleep and that doesn't help things. Melanie is too scared to talk to me because of the stroke and fear that I won't sound the same. The truth is I sound the same but I'm not that person I was before.